what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
