U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
