it wasn't lemon gatorade
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
