i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
