Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
they need to just BURY HIM!
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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