people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize