Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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