Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
