i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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