My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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