This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I want to stick my p in your. b.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
