I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize
