Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
