My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize