Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
