Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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