I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
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