Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I think my moral compass just broke
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