He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize