The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
