I am puke
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Randomize
