Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
