So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
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