remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
