If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
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