dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
