Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
