margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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