He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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