Her vagina should come with caution tape.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
