I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
