The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
