Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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