return my video game
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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