She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
try to milk me bitch
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