Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
