He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
