Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
