You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
