i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Randomize