you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
You're like the curious george of whores
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
What drink are we having for lunch?
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
