my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Randomize