I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Randomize
