The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I don't deserve a penis
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize