that's an acceptable place to lick
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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