whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
