everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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