I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I love having hate sex.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
