I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
how does that bad decision feel?
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