she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
