but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
